Let’s learn from the Japanese art of Kintsugi – We may be damaged but we’re still beautiful

The Japanese have a long tradition of repairing pots with gold; it’s called ‘kintsugi’. Arthur Goode shares about his work as a pastor and what he learnt from this ancient art of golden joinery.

Part of my ministry involves the privilege of taking funerals for people. It is a privilege in so many ways. Part of that has to do with being there in a significant moment of someone’s life. The biggest moments in all of our lives are at the beginning, around a birth. A few important middle bits – moving house, starting a new job and of course getting married, and then the end (what my father-in-law calls hatching, matching and despatching).

Being with people as they navigate the process of grief, remembering and celebrating the life of a loved one, and saying goodbye – that is a huge moment to be a part of – albeit from the fringes looking in, and just trying to serve people and help them as best you can. That’s a real privilege and one I don’t take lightly.

But it is also a privilege at those times to get to know people and hear their stories. People are amazing – even the most ordinary of lives are extraordinary, in that it is a unique person made in the image of God – a life lived. So often people think that they are ordinary and normal, but I have begun to realise that there is no such thing.

And as well as all of us sharing the same fate – none of us live forever, the death rate for humanity is 100%.  As well as this there is something else we all hold in common, but perhaps don’t always acknowledge – none of us are perfect. Along the way we make mistakes, hurt others and get hurt ourselves. But this doesn’t detract from our stories – in fact it adds to them.

Kintsugi – golden joinery

The Japanese have a long tradition of repairing pots with gold; it’s called “kintsugi”. It began in the late 15th century, when the shogun Ashikaga Yoshimasa sent a damaged Chinese tea bowl back to China to be fixed.  It returned held together with ugly metal staples, launching Japanese craftsmen on a quest for a new form of repair that could make a broken piece look as good as new, or better.   

The term “kintsugi” means ‘golden joinery’ in Japanese and refers to the art of fixing broken ceramics with gold. A vessel fixed by kintsugi will look more gorgeous, and more precious, than before it was fractured. Some see it as a creative addition or re-birth to the pot’s life story.  Others say that when something has suffered damage and has a history, it becomes more beautiful.

Either way it is a metaphor for the way in which we travel through life receiving our fair share of knocks, scrapes and chips, but these don’t ruin us – they make us more valuable, more interesting, perhaps more beautiful.

None of us are perfect, and as we go through life we all get knocks and chips and damage. But we have a choice to make in how we view these, and how we can turn them into beauty.

Our repairs can transform us. If we will embrace them and allow this good work in our lives.

However – I think we (as in the world we live in, the culture into which we are emerged) are in danger of adopting a rather warped sense of what is beautiful, and we may well undervalue each other as a result.

God restores people

There is a pressure on conformity to some external standard of beauty. One that shuns variety, diversity, age and difference. One that doesn’t necessarily embrace mistakes and damage. I get to sit down and hear incredible tales of ordinary bravery, lives well lived and histories made. These are stories of flawed and damaged people for sure – in that we all share imperfections and mistakes. The older we get the more they stack up. But the Bible gives us perspective on this that is helpful. The amazing thing about the Bible, regardless of your theology, is that it is a story of mistakes, broken people and damaged histories (if I were collating a religious book I’m not sure I would be that honest and at times basic about the failures of the people involved). But threading through the accounts runs a vein of gold: God healing and redeeming his people, restoring relationship with him if they can but turn and receive his grace.

There is a reality and an honesty, and a very real hope that our mistakes do not discount us from the love of God, and that there is a beauty in humanity which shines through.

May the healing power of God’s love and the repairing and restorative work of the Holy Spirit be like gold that runs through your life

What we are beginning to lose in society, but interestingly enough what we see in communities like churches and football clubs – two places I am often found skulking around – is the chance for young and old to rub shoulders together.  In our increasingly segmented society this is becoming rarer and therefore more valuable. Younger people have the opportunity to hear people’s stories, see the beauty of their imperfect lives and get a fresh (ancient) perspective on life: that we don’t need to seek perfection, and we don’t need to fear failure. Things can go wrong and life will go on. Others have faced life’s challenges and got through it, so you can too.

In melting pots like church and football clubs, and in the olden days pubs, social clubs and neighbourhoods, you have role models who are living proof of survivors of life’s rich tapestry who can show younger people that if they got through it so can you. That it’s OK to make mistakes – because everyone in the room has to one degree or another.

And that true beauty develops with age, as the cracks are repaired, as in kintsugi, the pot becomes more interesting, more valuable and in many ways nicer to look at.

It is good that a conversation about mental health is being encouraged. The pressure to look good and the fear of failure are two huge contributing factors in difficulties some young people have. The wisdom and non-anxious presence our older generation can offer is more important than ever.

The Bible says that humanity is like treasure, and that we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. (2 Corinthians 4:7)

May the healing power of God’s love and the repairing and restorative work of the Holy Spirit be like gold that runs through your life and may you know deep in your soul the honour of being an image bearer of the almighty today!