The wonder of unconditional love

At the time of writing this my wife is pregnant with our first child. Anyone who has been through a pregnancy will know it is a unique and profound process. 

I can remember when my wife first found out she was pregnant. We were both so excited and amazed that we would soon be welcoming our child into the world. 

For many women the first few weeks and months of a pregnancy can be difficult with many getting bouts of morning sickness and other effects. Thankfully my wife didn’t experience any of this which, combined with the fact that it takes a little while for any bump to show, left her thinking am I really pregnant? Is this really happening? After all, all we had to go on was a line on a plastic pregnancy test!

As things progressed a bump started to appear and, in what seemed like no time at all, she could feel the little one moving around. A bizarre experience I’m sure when it first happened!

Gradually as baby grew I could feel him or her (we still don’t yet know what we’re having!) kick and move around by placing my hand on the bump. 

It is remarkable the deep sense of connection I felt from these tiny movements and I know my wife feels the same. 

We both have such an immense love for the little one despite having not yet seen them, held them or heard their voice.

 I think it is the closest I have ever felt to genuine unconditional love. 

Unconditional love is sadly all too rare in the world we live in. We can often derive our value from what we do, how successful we are in terms of money, our job and life accomplishments. There can so often be an underlying sense that we are only lovable and valuable based on what we bring to the table.

You may have had a difficult upbringing or hard life experiences that have reinforced this in your life. 

To be honest even though I had incredible parents who expressed unconditional love towards me I know I can so easily turn to my own efforts, work and performance to try and prove my worth to others and try to gain affection. It is a very human trait and yet one which is ultimately tiring and unfulfilling.

It is not to say that taking pride in work and accomplishing things in life is a problem but when these things form our underlying value as people it is a weak foundation for life.  

There is a significant scripture which you may well have come across which talks of God’s connection to us as humans. It reads; “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.”

God knows us better than anyone and has seen, known and loved each of us right from our conception. 

As I embark on becoming a parent I know that the love I have for my child is not based on anything they can do for me. I already love them now before they have even been born. 

In other words this child is loved purely because they exist. 

That is the reality for each of us too. We are God’s children loved purely because we are here. 

The more I consider this truth it changes so much in my life. It changes how I see myself and others, what I do and how and why I do it. 

Initially it may seem as though unconditional love is a free pass to do what you want with no regard for the consequences. Although this could not be further from the truth. 

The more I know how much God loves me the more I want to do the things that please him. The more I know how valuable I am the more I want to do the things that are good for me. The more I know how valuable other people are the more I want to treat them well and extend the love I receive with others.